You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
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