You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
Randomize
