Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes
And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me.
At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements.
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
Randomize
