So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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