Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize
