You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
Randomize
