guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
She announced her abortion via fbk
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers