i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
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