she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
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