he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
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