does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
