Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
im drinking this country out of the recession.
Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
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