Just fell off a train. Bad.
Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
These 19 Guys Hit The Cougar Jackpot
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
35 Disappointing People Who Failed At Sexting
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex