Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
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