guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
My mom is lecturing me about 'invaluable housekeeping skills' while I google 'cocktails involving gin' on my phone. I can feel the generational gap looming in her silent judgment of my choices.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
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