dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy