just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
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