Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
