Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
Based on my calculations, I should be blackout by approximately 11:14pm and that's when I need you to take my phone away from me. Mkay?
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
Randomize
