Pappa wants mamma naked
i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
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