So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
