my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
Randomize
