so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Randomize
