Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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