Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
Randomize
