How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
no you cant smoke seaweed
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
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