using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
Randomize
