Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Randomize
