he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
Randomize
