yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
Randomize