i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
The cabbie told me fat girls shouldn't wear tight clothes, and that he feels bad for the guys that have to be underneath them, especially because their positions are "very limited" and proceeded to ask me if I had a trash can and if I could throw something away for him. Don't worry though, he promised it wasn't anything "bad". He then handed me a tied up grocery bag with a bunch of wadded up Kleenex that weighed about 3 pounds. To answer your question, yes I made it home. Fml
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
Randomize
