K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
hell yes lets make some ravioli
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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