he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
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