stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
Randomize
