I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
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in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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