We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
We left the knife in your bed.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
Randomize
