why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
Randomize
