Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
Randomize