She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
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