Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
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