I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
In other news, just had to pluck an ingrown pub with the pliers from my multi tool while sitting on the toilet at work.
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
Randomize