Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Randomize
