so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
