I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
I have aggressive nipples.
Randomize
