South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
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