I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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