The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
My balls are so social today.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
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