Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
Randomize
