new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
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