Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Randomize
