please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
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